Genesis 24:55-58

God’s Ways in Choosing a Marriage Partner


Genesis 24:55-58 but her brother and her mother said let the girl stay with us a few days say ten afterward she may go he said to them do not delay me since the LORD has prospered my way send me away that I may go to my master and they said we will call the girl and consult her wishes then they called Rebekah and said to her will you go with this man? and she said I will go Shabbat Shalom this is an incredible thing talking about the marriage arrangement between Isaac and Rebekah Abraham sent the servant to a distant land to his relatives to find a wife for his son Isaac and what’s amazing is that we see the servant came to the family and talked to this woman Rebekah and her family and asked will she go with me become the wife of my master Isaac and they said well let’s consult with her and ask her what she would like to do and she said yes I will go so she went to become the wife of a man that she had never met what an amazing amazing thing can you imagine that would happen in our day I think actually God’s system of arranging marriages is something that is closer it’s something that we need to have an understanding of and return to I’m not suggesting that we have arranged marriages today our system today is such that most people don’t even consult their parents a lot of young people don’t even have parents involved in a marriage partner selection process do you know how it happens it happens through what we call the dating system which is just having an interest in that person of the opposite gender and pursuing that interest through thoughts, looks, notes, talks, events being with that person there’s no consultation with parents and I’ve told many many parents that system really doesn’t work very well it’s producing more than a 50% divorce rate in our culture do you know what I believe God intended for there to be a partnership between parents and a son partnership between parents and a daughter to pray together why is it? because parents see things they see character in that other person they see family patterns in that other person where as a young person when they romantically give their heart out to another person all they can think of is but I want to be with him I want to be with her they don’t see character they don’t see family patterns they don’t see what God is doing so many times what happens is people make devastating choices and here’s something that just happens in our dating system when people become boyfriend and girlfriend and pair off it’s like gluing your heart together suppose I’m in a youth group I glue my heart to that girl we become boyfriend and girlfriend it’s like our hearts are glued together but this wasn’t designed by God to end in marriage we’re only 15 years old anyway so it’s eventually going to it’s going to rip and when that relationship breaks like the old adage said breaking up is hard to do there’s a wounding there’s a hurting there’s a tear in my heart and you know because I’m wounded part of my heart remains with that girl what do I do because I’m wounded? go look for another one and suppose I find another girlfriend I glue my heart to her that wasn’t intended to end in marriage either so that relationship is going to break it has no long term purpose it was rooted in self gratification for the purpose of having fun it breaks and now I only have this much heart left and suppose I do that again and again and again five, six, seven, eight times before I get married and I give out my heart to all these different girls during teenage years dating years and finally I come to the point where I’m ready to get married and I meet the woman that God has given me to marry and at the alter I come to her and I say on our wedding day honey I love you so much I want to give you my whole heart and this is all that’s left because I gave pieces of it out to other people I don’t have a whole heart to give my wife can you imagine why it is there’s so much conflict in marriage why it takes people so many years many times just to get back up to zero because of the wounding the rejection the damage that’s happened in this system please don’t do that here’s the question in your family do you have a strategy to manage romantic relationships do you have a strategy in your family for how people will find a marriage partner or are you just leaving that up to chance or to society or to what other people think I encourage you don’t do that at the very least if you are parents you’re husband and wife pray together with your son or daughter come before the LORD and ask God what is the strategy by which we should be handling romantic relationships this is awesome you look at Isaac and Rebekah their marriage lasted there was no divorce that occurred they didn’t struggle and have all kinds of problems God was in it and I believe God will do a similar thing for you but there has to be a strategy in every family how are we going to handle romantic relationships Abraham had a strategy he knew how he had a purpose and a strategy of how he was going to find a wife for his son Isaac and Isaac agreed with it so establish a strategy in your family of how romantic relationships will be handled how you will choose marriage partners in your family and walk according to the strategy that God gives you and I believe God’s favorite strategy is a partnership between parents and a son between parents and a daughter praying together seeking God’s best interest God Bless You


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