Ephesians 5:28-31

Eight Qualities for a Godly Marriage Partner


Ephesians 5:28-31 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies he who loves his own wife loves himself for no one ever hated his own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it just as Christ also does the church because we are members of His body for this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh I want to talk today about marriage I want to talk about 8 qualities that a single person who’s thinking of getting married might consider looking to and this is not an exhaustive list of qualities, but these are 8 I learned probably more than 40 years ago from Bill Gothard when I went to a seminar many many years ago these are 8 qualities that I believe will really help you the very first quality I would tell someone to look for in looking for a marriage partner they must be born again the person you’re considering marrying needs to be in covenant with the LORD if they’re not born again how are you going to be able to walk together with each other through life if you’ve got a major spiritual division between you John 3:16 talks about being born again the second quality is that person ought to have self acceptance the Bible says that you’re to love others as you love yourself how on earth are you going to love another person if you don’t love yourself so I would certainly look for somebody that has self acceptance not walking with a lot of shame a lot of self pity a lot of self hatred or judgment toward self but self acceptance Psalm 139:14 -16 I’ll just give you a scripture with each one the third thing I would want that person to be under authority I will want to see that they’re rightly related to their parents to their pastor to their employer the person they work for that they’re not a rebel because if I marry that person I’m going to engage in the same rebellion or they’re going to be rebellious toward me or I’m going to have a big fight on my hands so I want to make sure that they’re rightly related to authority Romans 13:1 fourth I want to make sure they have a clear conscience they’re not carrying around a lot of guilt I want a person that could actually say there’s no one that I know of that I’ve wronged that I have not gone and at least tried to make it right Acts 24:16 then they must know how to yield their rights to God and to be free of Anger, worry, frustration those kind of things not somebody who walks around with a ton of stress in their life but somebody that has given their rights over to God that eliminates anger that eliminates frustration if I allow God to govern in my life I don’t have all kinds of expectations that are constantly being violated making me angry and frustrated all the time so I want somebody who’s learned to yield their rights up to God 1 Corinthians 6:19 then I want somebody that has moral freedom I want the spirit within them to be stronger than their flesh I want them to be governed and directed by the spirit of God through their spirit not somebody that’s constantly fighting moral battles fighting all kinds of compulsions of the flesh but a person that has learned how to function in self control John 8:34-36 and someone who knows God’s purpose for life I would look for a person to marry who has some inkling some sense of their destiny their purpose what God has called them to do particularly if you’re a woman and you’re looking for a husband if you marry a man who doesn’t know where he’s going how on earth are you going to follow him it’s not possible of course really for both marriage partners to marry a wife or a husband I would encourage you look for somebody who has some sense maybe not 100% but some pretty strong sense of purpose in their life Galatians 1:15-17 and then the 8th quality I would want that person to have financial freedom I would not want somebody that does not understand the principle of meekness in finances I would not want to marry somebody that’s already taken a lot of debt that doesn’t understand the principle of financial freedom Romans 13:8 talks about that so these are 8 good qualities that if you’re a single person looking to get married you could apply or if you have children that are getting toward the age that are going to be married or maybe you have small children you can save the notes on these 8 things to look for in a potential marriage partner that we might walk in Godliness and walk in God’s purposes in marriage not just marrying somebody because we like them or they make us feel good but really seeking God and finding his best interest in who He has for us to marry these are 8 good qualities to consider so let’s just pray Father I pray for each one of us today that you would speak to us how does this apply to me maybe I’m already married LORD am I a person who has these 8 qualities or are there some of these qualities yet lacking in my life God even though I’m married are there things that I need to work on and develop in terms of these 8 qualities now let me just interrupt my prayer and say this please don’t apply this to your marriage partner don’t say to your marriage partner you need to change this no, no, no let God change your marriage partner you change yourself so are there qualities in me that need to change and is this information I need to convey to a son or a daughter so Father I pray that you just apply this to our lives today and remember as you go through your day today would you love God with all your heart bless people around you you will make a profound difference in your environment


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